Light-Heartedness Newsletter — January 2009 "Making Peace with Change" "Light-Heartedness is a state of mind where you feel love, joy, peace and laughter as the norm in your everyday life."   — Kari Joys MS

Contact Kari E-mail: kari@kari-joys.com Phone: 509-534-7374 About Kari Kari Joys MS offers tools for transforming challenging emotional issues into joy, peace and light-heartedness. She provides counseling and psychotherapy in Spokane, Washington for anxiety, depression, self-esteem, abuse or dysfunctional family issues, and for couples, marriage or divorce issues. Kari offers books, workshops and FREE Light-Heartedness E-Letters nationwide! Kari Joys MS is the director of the Center for Creative Change. She is a compassionate author, a highly recognized psychotherapist, a skilled group facilitator and a powerful energy therapist. Through her psychotherapy and her intensive personal growth workshops, Kari has guided thousands of people through the incredible emotional healing journey that opens the door to fulfilling one's highest spiritual purpose. Testimonial "Your work in the light has really meant a lot to me personally — it's changed my life! I'm doing well in the holidays; no depression, no feelings of separateness or anything negative. Thank you so much for all your help!" ~ Rick Buy the book: Choosing Light-Heartedness! Discover Kari's many valuable tools and insights for transforming your life. Order Choosing Light-Heartedness online. Learn short activities and simple psychological tools to transform depression into joy, anxiety into inner peace, and poor self-esteem into radiant self-love. Kari has compiled the knowledge from her twenty-five years psychotherapy practice into her easy-to-follow book. "Choosing Light-Heartedness" will greatly speed up your emotional healing process. • Understand the real issues behind your depression, anxiety and poor self-esteem • Release unfinished baggage from the past through Emotional Healing • Learn to love and appreciate yourself in new and wonderful ways • Learn tools for communicating your feelings with love and respect • Read touching stories of people like you who overcame the past and are now living happy fulfilling lives • Discover ways to incorporate your own spirituality into your emotional healing journey Receive FREE Light-Heartedness E-Letters today! Learn ways to bring more Joy and Light-Heartedness into your life: Sign up for Kari's FREE Light-Heartedness e-letters. Develop a healthy, light-hearted approach to everyday living! • Use powerful affirmations to reprogram your thinking • Practice simple, experiential exercises to create healthy life patterns • Develop a healthy Light-Hearted approach to everyday living • Laugh regularly and have more fun in your life Take Kari's Journey to Light-Heartedness E-Course! Do you want the most powerful tools Kari can provide online? Go deeper into your healing process with the Journey to Light-Heartedness E-Course. Go deeper with your commitment to Light-Heartedness with Kari's direct guidance! Experience enlightening sessions with Kari in the comfort and safety or your own home. You'll receive 10 beautiful flash movies and 18 powerful guided visualizations that will greatly speed up the healing process! • Go deeper with your emotional healing journey • Forgive and release the people who hurt you in the past • Release your depression and anxiety, one day at a time • Reprogram your unconscious mind • Develop deep, loving relationships • Create abundance in all areas of your life • Find your natural humor and your playful light-heartedness • Let your true spirit shine in the world "The program was powerful! I will treasure and use the tools you've taught me daily." ~ Molly Read Kari's Articles Online! Read some of Kari's articles that are available right now online. • 7 Tools for Staying Light-Hearted in Challenging Times • 8 Tips for Light-Heartedness during Dysfunctional Family Gatherings • Heal Emotions with Light-Heartedness: Achieve Long-Term Benefits through Emotional Healing • Feelings: How to Help the Man You Love Learn to Express His Feelings! Come to a Light-Heartedness Workshop! Work with Kari Joys in person at a Light-Heartedness Workshop. Be ready to have your life transformed! In a safe, supportive and beautiful environment, you'll have the opportunity to turn your life around! • Heal and release your 'pain body' • Learn to release anxiety and depression • Empower yourself • Enjoy the present • Laugh from the inside out Receive Private Counseling from Kari Joys Learn more about private counseling with Kari. Clear past baggage and transform your life! Kari is a dynamic catalyst for healing. You'll receive kindness, compassion and understanding while you face the truth of your life and make changes to live the life of your dreams. See Kari Joys Website For more on Kari Joys book, services, articles, e-letters, and e-course, see her website. Sign Up for Newsletter If you're not already a subscriber, go to Kari Joys website to sign up for the newsletter. Or send your name and e-mail address to: kari@kari-joys.com Words of Wisdom "Someday, after we have mastered the winds, the waves, the tides, and gravity, we shall harness for God the energies of love. Then, for the second time in the history of the world, we will have discovered fire." ~ Teilhard de Chardin Kari's Recommended Websites Check out this beautiful website to get in touch with the love and appreciation you deserve! www.hasanyonetoldyou.com Are you feeling down or depressed? Here's another great website - watch it! www.maniacworld.com/are- you-going-to-finish- strong.html Winter Humor A new study says that one of the advantages of the treadmill is that it's the highest calorie burner of the exercises. Another advantage is that hamsters can now laugh at us. *************** "Rescued Human" Her eyes met mine as she walked down the corridor peering apprehensively into the kennels. I felt her need instantly and knew I had to help her. I wagged my tail, not too exuberantly, so she wouldn't be afraid. As she stopped at my kennel I blocked her view from a little accident I had in the back of my cage. I didn't want her to know that I hadn't been walked today. Sometimes the shelter keepers get too busy and I didn't want her to think poorly of them. As she read my kennel card I hoped that she wouldn't feel sad about my past. I only have the future to look forward to and want to make a difference in someone's life. She got down on her knees and made little kissy sounds at me. I shoved my shoulder and side of my head up against the bars to comfort her. Gentle fingertips caressed my neck; she was desperate for companionship. A tear fell down her cheek and I raised my paw to assure her that all would be well. Soon my kennel door opened and her smile was so bright that I instantly jumped into her arms. I would promise to keep her safe. I would promise to always be by her side. I would promise to do everything I could to see that radiant smile and sparkle in her eyes. I was so fortunate that she came down my corridor. So many more are out there who haven't walked the corridors. There are so many more to be saved. At least I could save one. I rescued a human today! *************** The police officer got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the officer said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket. *************** Before computers... Memory was something you lost with age An application was for employment A program was a TV show A cursor used profanity A keyboard was a piano A web was a spider's home A virus was the flu A CD was a bank account A hard drive was a long trip on the road A mouse pad was where a mouse lived And if you had a 3 inch floppy... You just hoped nobody ever found out! *************** Deep in the back woods of Kentucky, a redneck's wife went into labor in the middle of the night. The country doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be the lantern and said "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing!" Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. "Whoa there," said the doctor, "Don't be in such a rush to put the lantern down. I think there's another one coming!" Sure enough, within minutes, he delivered a baby girl. "Hold that lantern up, don't set it down, there's another one!" said the doctor. Within a few minutes, he had delivered a third baby. "No, don't be in a hurry to put that lantern down, it seems there's yet another one coming," cried the doctor. The redneck scratched his head in bewilderment and asked the doctor... "You reckon it might be the light that's attractin' 'em?" *************** Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out. When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable. When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love. I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness. The bad news is, Ralph hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead." Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself. I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?" Testimonial "Thank you immensely for being there for me at crucial times. Your patience, care and compassion are truly priceless!" ~ Gina Words of Wisdom "Life is not holding a good hand; Life is playing a poor hand well." ~ Danish proverb Change is a Gift! There are huge changes happening in our world right now. Things don't look the same as they did a few months ago. People around us are afraid and everyone is wondering what's happening. Are we going into an economic depression? Will we be able to survive? How will this change affect our lives? Change is scary for most people. No one likes to stand in the face of the unknown, wondering if they will be safe or happy. But even though change can be challenging, sometimes change is necessary. Sometimes the old ways have to die for the new to be born. Sometimes, even though we fret and panic, when all is said and done, the change we feared was actually the best thing that ever happened to us. Have you noticed that the structures in our world that are based on selfishness and greed are falling apart, while structures that are built on love and peace are growing by leaps and bounds? Newsletter at a Glance A woman I really admire once said "A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down." So this newsletter includes tools and suggestions for your daily practice of making your world a better place through change. I hope they'll help you enjoy this amazing roller coaster ride we're on. • Read the 10 tips for practical solutions to our daily challenges. • Prepare for positive change in 2009 by reading Jo Dunning's predictions. • Face your changes naturally and drug free by learning about emotional healing. • Leave the stresses of modern life behind by joining an eco-village, as described in the "Anastasia" books. • Read solutions from our friend's websites and readers' letters. • A spoonful of humor makes it all fun. Winter Humor To: YOU Date: TODAY From: GOD Subject: YOURSELF Reference: LIFE Hello--this is God. Today I will be handling All of your problems for you. I do Not need your help. So, have a nice day. I love you. P.S. Remember... If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do Not attempt to resolve it yourself! Kindly put it in the SFGTD (something for God to do) box. I will get to it in MY TIME. All situations will be resolved, but in My time, not yours. Once the matter is placed into the box, do not hold onto it by worrying about it. Instead, focus on all the wonderful things that are present in your life now. God 10 Tips for Making Peace with Change By Kari Joys Change is difficult for many people--especially those of us who grew up in dysfunctional families. We like to stay in our comfort zone. We prefer things to be safe and secure. Even little changes that we choose for ourselves can often require months of emotional adjustment, like having a baby, or moving to a new area. But when change happens that's out of our control, like getting laid off from a job, or a partner asking for a divorce, we often feel overwhelmed. And when the world economic structure falls apart, like it has recently, it can look like an insurmountable crisis. When you're not aware, change can make you feel worried and stressed. On an unconscious level, change can make you feel vulnerable and out of control, which reminds you of negative experiences from childhood when you were small and vulnerable. If you're not aware, you can unknowingly go into defensive, reactive behavior, expecting the worst and protecting yourself from your perceived enemies. Fortunately, with awareness you can transform those negative responses. You can choose, instead, to see change as a gift. And by making that choice, you can open to the amazing opportunities change offers you-- to learn and grow in the process. So what can you do when the world you know falls apart? Why not learn to ride the waves of life instead of trying to control everything? Here are 10 Tips for Making Peace with Change: 1. Surrender! Let the Universe take charge of your life. The Universe knows much better than you or I what will be for your best and highest good. 2. Cry when you need to cry! Crying is a natural way to release your pain and stress. 3. Forgive yourself and forgive others! Blaming yourself or blaming others for your emotional pain just keeps you stuck in a rut. Forgiveness doesn't condone negative behavior; it just sets you free to move forward. 4. Stay open to the life lessons that Universe wants to teach you. The Universe always wants you to learn about self-acceptance, self-esteem and self-actualization. 5. Practice gratitude constantly! Gratitude takes you into a natural high and opens you for greater good to come your way. 6. Replace your negative expectations with positive affirmations. Practice your faith in the goodness of the Universe and affirm that good things are coming your way. 7. Imagine regularly already having the good you want to create. Spend at least five minutes every day seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and feeling yourself already having all the good you want to create. Have fun with this! 8. Share the love in your heart by learning healthy communication skills. If you want others to feel the love you have for them, it's important to show your love by the way you communicate on a daily basis. 9. Laugh regularly and keep your sense of humor. It's hard to stay negative and depressed when you're laughing! People love friends who make them laugh. 10. Find simple ways to have fun with the people you love! Fun doesn't have to be expensive! Go sledding, play Frisbee, take a walk together or play a game! And, whatever you do, don't forget to stay open to the good the Universe has in store for you. When you look back ten years from now, you may be saying "Even though I thought that the world had turned upside down, those were the best years of my life!" Transform a challenging situation into a positive growth experience by learning powerful tools for emotional healing with Kari's "Journey to Light-Heartedness" e-course! Winter Humor A poor man walking in the forest feels close enough to God to ask, "God, what is a million years to you?" God replies, "My son, a million years to you is like a second to me." The man asks, "God, what is a million dollars to you?" God replies, "My son, a million dollars to you is less than a penny to me. It means almost nothing to me." The man then asks, "So God, can I have a million dollars?" And God replies, "In a second." Prepare for a Positive 2009 with Predictions by Jo Dunning Jo Dunning is an amazing international healer who offers free teleconference workshops twice a month, giving free energy work to help you create the life you want to live. I so much appreciated Jo's recent 2009 predictions that I wanted to share them with you. With all the negativity going on around us, we all need to hear some positive predictions sometimes! Here is Jo's 2009 message: As we enter the New Year of 2009, we will be starting what is called a Master Year which is indicated by the number 11 and promotes the transformation of the physical into the Divine in every area of life. This coming year, 2009, is a time of Awakening into the new, clearing and releasing of the old and a greatly accelerated transformation into a new way of living. We are in the final wonderful days of preparation for the full arrival of what is classically called The Golden Age or 1000 Year of Peace. So many wonderful events and energies are all combining now to help create the world of our dreams. It will be a world in which we experience peace within our hearts and minds, abundance and caring, compassion and love for our self and others. This time of miracles will bring many changes, some of which will happen quickly and unexpectedly. All the events will assist in guiding us into a new life and consciousness. We are in the process now of clearing out the old systems which no longer serves everyone and replacing them with new ways of love and life. The financial, economic and political world is in transition into a new and greater form which will be of much greater benefit to all. The physical world as well will be changing to support and encourage the transformation of our consciousness. As we move through the changes ahead and transition into a greater experience of Love and Peace, it will be helpful to keep in mind the miraculous life which is being created. Focus on the miracles you wish to experience and carry in your heart the joy of the life you have and the excitement of the new life being created. Trust the process, quiet the mind, and focus your thoughts and intention on what your heart desires. Know it is yours. Continually remember that a great Light is now pouring into your body, mind and soul and filling you with new joy, wisdom and truth. The whole world is moving through this time together and will emerge together into a much greater expression of Love and Oneness. As you move into these amazing new times, carry your Truth brightly, knowing all is well and the Light is growing into full radiance within you and the entire world. Keep your mind and thoughts focused on the awareness of the great transformation now taking place and the magnificent outcome which will soon be yours. Know you are very blessed to be here to experience this transformation. Focus your heart and mind on this miracle of love as you participate fully in this great opportunity. Reach out to others and assist them on their journey. We are all taking this journey into Oneness together and it is together, as one, we will arrive. Everyone is included, Yes, EVERYONE !!!! To get on Jo Dunning's prayer list or learn more about her free teleconference workshops, check out www.jodunning.com. Why not get comfortable with the changes in your life and save yourself years of therapy by reading Kari Joys' enlightening book "Choosing Light-Heartedness?" Emotional Healing or Anti-Depressants? By Kari Joys As a psychotherapist, I have strong feelings about how quickly health care professionals prescribe anti-depressants these days. Let me tell you my own history-- I've been involved with emotional healing for thirty years. When I first entered an emotional healing therapy group as a client in the 1970s, it was a brand new field. I was anxious and depressed, but I didn't know why. No one talked about emotions back then. The idea that you could get in touch with your emotions and express them to help you heal was outrageous to most people. The Long-Term Benefits of Emotional Healing By doing emotional healing, over the years my life changed dramatically. Although I had previously felt worthless and broken, after therapy I began to love the person I saw in the mirror. I developed compassion and understanding for myself. I went from being anxious and depressed to finding joy and inner peace. I began to follow my dreams. I did things I previously thought were impossible. I discovered that I had a natural sense of humor that had been dormant for many years. I began to laugh and have fun more regularly. I became a psychotherapist because I felt my spiritual purpose was to help others heal. After experiencing intense emotional pain myself, I couldn't bear to see others hurting without doing something to help them heal. But in spite of my love for emotional healing, I became somewhat disillusioned with the field of psychology as a whole. Somewhere along the way, health care professionals began diagnosing people and prescribing anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medications instead of focusing on overcoming the pain. This has always been very sad to me. I wonder where I would be today if, when I was hurting, a health care professional had told me that I would just have to cope with my emotional issues and take medication for the rest of my life. Read more of this article online! Book Review: "Anastasia," from the Ringing Cedars Series I recently read an exciting book that a lot of my friends have been talking about. It's called "Anastasia," from the Ringing Cedars Series. It talks about a different kind of life, where people live close to nature, and love and peace are the only way to be. It's wonderful winter reading — I highly recommend it! Here is the publisher's description from the back cover of the book: There is so much mind-blowing material in these books it's almost impossible to give you an overview! What we can tell you is this... This real-life story begins in 1995. A trader prepares his ships to embark on the most remarkable trip of his life — a trip that will change the course of millions of human lives. Ahead of him lies the mighty Ob River — winding and snaking for 3,500 miles through the Siberian taiga — the vast boreal forest — that stretches across Northern Europe, Alaska and Canada. A warning! Nothing you have ever read before can prepare you for the journey you are about to take. You are about to meet Anastasia — a beautiful young woman — discovered by the author, living alone deep in the remote wild forests of Siberia. She is considered to be a surviving member of an ancient Vedic civilisation whose extraordinary powers and knowledge far exceed anything known today. Anastasia's powerful, myth-shattering messages reveal a profound wisdom grounded in ancient knowledge; they expose suppressed secrets and hidden historical facts that will completely change your understanding of our past, and offer a whole new paradigm for our planet's future. Anastasia will lift you up and hurl you into a future that is... well... everything you imagined life could and certainly should be! The twist is... it's here NOW! Anastasia will have you dancing with delight and squealing with excitement as you re-discover YOU... in all your glory! Anastasia's messages will simply blow your mind! Her soft-spoken words go straight to your heart — like nothing you have ever read! And the more you read them... the better you'll feel. Anastasia will restore your hope for the future and re-ignite your passion for life. After reading these books — nothing will be quite the same... Click here to purchase "Anastasia," from the Ringing Cedars Series at Amazon.com! Readers Contribute Book Review: Toxic Parents, Overcoming their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life by Susan Forward Hi there, Kari! Happy New Year! Thank you for your amazing news letters! I enjoy them so much. I find them very supportive and uplifting. I am responding to say thank you and to share with you a book that has really helped me. It's called Toxic Parents, Overcoming their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life by Susan Forward. It was brilliant timing for me to read Toxic Parents this year. It has helped me forgive myself and I have grown up a lot. I have now let go of my parents, especially my mother. I realized that they were never going to be the fantasy family I wanted. I also realized that when things improved with them they were just co-dependent people on their best behavior. I feel free, so light and more alive then I ever have before! What's more I feel so peaceful and life is so easy. Thanks again! Lots of Love, Emma Hi Emma, Thanks for your sweet e-mail! I'm so glad to hear that your life is better and you are feeling more peaceful! That's terrific! Thank you too for mentioning the book Toxic Parents! I, too, think that book is very helpful for overcoming dysfunctional family issues. Stay happy, Emma, and keep up the good work! Love and de-light, Kari If you're interested in ordering Toxic Parents, click here to order it on Amazon.com. Parenting Issues Hello Kari, Thank you so much for your newsletter and your email series. They have meant so much to me and helped me to create a happier life! I have a question that is troubling me. My son is experiencing some problems in life. I know it could be much worse, but I am concerned that he is accumulating some emotional pain. As a teenager approaching adulthood, he doesn't always listen to me. How do I reach him? I wish he would look at your materials. He always tells me he is OK. The other question that I have is that I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt. I feel like our family's dysfunction may have caused his pain and I rack my brain trying to think about what I could have/should have done. I feel like this is all my fault. Some rational part of me tries to convince me that I did my best, etc., but the truth is: I don't believe that. If I were honest, I'd say that I feel terrible - like a terrible person. You are busy this time of year, so I understand that I might not get a response or maybe you have helpers who answer emails (kind of like Santa's helpers)! But just writing this is cathartic. Merry Christmas to you and your family! It must feel very satisfying to know that you have helped so many people. God bless, Patti Hi Patti, Thank you for your sweet e-mail! You sound lovely! Being the Mom of a teenager is always challenging--especially with all the pressures in the world today. When my daughters were teenagers, I had challenges with them too. Like you said, it could have been much worse, but teenage years are a tough time! My daughters are now good little Mothers themselves, so it did work out over time. What you have to do during teenage years is trust that the love you have given your child all through his or her life will pay off in the long run. The one thing teenagers do recognize is love. Even if you make mistakes, they respect you, deep down inside, when you show them sincere love. Sharing your honest feelings with your son will help--tell him what you honestly feel when he makes the choices he makes, rather than trying to control him. Teenagers want total freedom with no responsibility, and the world just doesn't work like that! Our job as parents is to help them understand that freedom is based on responsibility. Try not to blame yourself for the past--all you can do is forgive the past, learn from your mistakes and do the best you can today. No one is a perfect parent; we are all the product of our past. If we can do better than our parents did for us, we should be very happy. You sound like a very loving, concerned parent—just try to trust that the love you have given him all though his life will pay off in the long run! Have a lovely, light-hearted New Year! Love and blessings, Kari Please send your feedback, thoughts or questions for our "Light-Hearted Readers Contribute" column to kari@kari-joys.com. Kari Joys Spokane, Washington Phone: 509-534-7374 Email: kari@kari-joys.com

Light-Heartedness Newsletter — January 2009 "Making Peace with Change" This newsletter designed by Good Cause Marketing

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